Emerald Tears
by cHiBiHiTaRu
Summary: a sweet lil' Hitomi and Van fic, but it takes her a lil' while to find out, that's why you have to read the whole thing through! pretty much that. a slice of lemon... plz R&R ^_^
1. Forsaken

Emerald Tears  
  
disclaimer:i don't own any of the escaflowne characters so don't sue ME!!!  
  
Her emerald green eyes scanned the heavens. As if in search of a star, a star that she could never reach. Confusion and sadness conquered her emotions. She had never felt so forsaken. A single tear ran down her cheeks and she shivered in the stillness of the night.  
  
Her best friend Yukari was sitting on a bench, by the track. Waiting. As if time stood still. She was about to call her name when suddenly, a tall handsome boy walked closer to where Yukari was sitting. Hitomi's eyes widened in surprise. It was Amano. The boy that had occupied her thoughts and ambitions. The boy that had left the state on a breezy fall afternoon. Never had anytime to say goodbye. Never told the reason of his departure. Just left. Left the romance that Hitomi and him had shared, left everything. Hitomi missed him until her soul ached. She always knew that he'd come back to her and everything would be alright.Now he was finally back. Suddenly, a small welcoming smile formed at the corner of Yukari's lips. She stood up, and Amano slipped his arms around her tightly. He drew her face close to his and the two shared a kiss underneath the star embedded sky. Hitomi could stand it no more. She cried out, turned and ran as far away from the track as possible. She could hear the surprised voices of her friends cry out "Hitomi! Hitomi..."  
She didn't stop. She kept running until She reached the waterfall. There was a clear view of the beautiful sky. Hitomi drew in a deep breath and let it out. "why?" she asked in a shaky voice. But did she love Amano? or did she not? She couldn't stop thinking about the handsome dark haired King she had left behind in Gaea. He was an Angel. Different from all the rest. He loved her deeply and they both knew it. But Hitomi didn't want to continue. She wanted her old life back.  
  
A single tear raced down Van's cheek. "Hitomi..." he pleaded. "please stay with me. don't leave me anymore."  
Hitomi raised her eyes to his and wrapped her arms around his neck. "I have to Van! i can't live here anymore. I have to return to my normal life. I... I can't live in a world that's not my own. " She said her eyes clouded with unshed tears. Van bit his lip and nodded. A sob rose in his throat. "If that's what you really want, I can't make you stay can I?" He stepped back from Hitomi with pain and hurt etched across his handsome features. He turned towards the sky and sprouted his wings. Without even a look backwards, He flew off quickly. Hitomi was transferred back to Earth. Where she belonged. Where she wanted to be. Or was it?  
  
Hitomi stood up. "sigh, what is it that I want. I have a reason to be hurt. Amano left me without saying goodbye, then comes back to be with Yukari. I have a reason. but..." She shivered again and raised her eyes to the sky. "Van, I need you..." She whispered. She felt a sense of longing for that Angel. She could hear the rhythmic beat of the water beating down in the rocks below. She could feel her heart beating to the very same beat. All of a sudden, she understood. "Maybe things were meant to be this way..." Then she turned and walked in search a light.  
  
End of Chpt 1 


	2. Return to Gaea

Emerald Tears  
  
"Van, I need you..." She whispered. She felt a sense of longing for that Angel. She could hear the rhythmic beat of the water beating down in the rocks below. She could feel her heart beating to the very same beat. All of a sudden, she understood. "Maybe things were meant to be this way..." Then she turned and walked in search a light.  
  
Hitomi walked to school slowly, her head still filled with visions from the night before. She walked into the schoolyard with an aching heart.  
"Hitomi!" a voice called behind her. She turned around and her eyes narrowed. It was Yukari. Yukari looked at Hitomi with such apoligetic eyes that Hitomi sat down and motioned Yukari to sit beside her. "Hitomi I..." Yukari's eyes went downcast then went back to meeting Hitomi's eyes. "About yesterday..." This is when Hitomi snapped. "I don't need you to explain! I know exactly what happened! I was there you know!" Hitomi yelled causing the whole school yard to look at them. Tears slipped out of Yukari's brown eyes. "I... look Hitomi! I know I should of told you that Amano had returned, but I love Amano so much! I should of told you that too. All I can say is that i'm sorry! You're my best friend Hitomi!"  
Yukari pleaded. "Look Yukari, I really don't care about what happened anymore. It's true you should of told me, but it's my fault that I didn't notice earlier. How could I have not noticed you loved Amano? because i'm selfish. That's why. You're my very best friend and I didn't know. I'm sorry." Hitomi said tears coming out of her own eyes. Yukari leaned forward and gave Hitomi a hug. "So your not mad at me?" She said. Hitomi's shoulders went cold and she slumped backwards. She stood up and frowned. "I really don't know yet." She turned and sprinted out of the doorway leaving Yukari sitting alone. Hitomi walked back to where she was previously sitting the night before and sat down. She sighed. "How could I not notice? My own best friend, loved the one I love. And he loved her back. All this time, I was pretending. That he cared about me. But how..."   
"Hitomi!" a male voice called. At the sound of this voice, Hitomi turned around and gasped. It was Amano. Tears filled Hitomi's eyes again. "No, Hitomi please don't cry. Listen to me." He said in the same pleading tone Yukari had. "What is there to listen to?" Hitomi said coldly and walked by Amano. Amano grabbed her hand and spun her towards him. "Listen!" he said. "Hitomi, i'm sorry you had to see what happened yesterday. I didn't tell you i returned. But I love Yukari now. I can't deny it any longer." Tears poured down Hitomi's face. She shook her hand out of his and pressed it over her ears. "I don't want to hear it anymore! Stop it!" Suddenly, her pendant began glowing. Amano gasped as his seagreen eyes sweeped across the heavens. A pillar of light flashed out of the heavens and carried Hitomi up into the sky. Amano was left screaming "Hitomi! Hitomi..."   
  
End of Chpt 2 


	3. Princess Cerli

Emerald Tears  
  
Amano gasped as his seagreen eyes sweeped across the heavens. A pillar of light flashed out of the heavens and carried Hitomi up into the sky. Amano was left screaming "Hitomi! Hitomi..."   
  
Hitomi opened her eyes. She rubbed her sore limbs and stood up. She was definitly in Gaea. "I'm, back. But, do I want to be here?" Hitomi thought. Suddenly, a loud noise interupted her thoughts. A silver Guymelef with a blue cape landed infront of her. Hitomi squinted, then smiled. It was Allen's Guymelef. "Hitomi???" A voice called from within. It was a voice that Hitomi missed dearly. A handsome young man with flowing blond hair jumped out of the guymelef. "Hitomi!" Allen said with joy and hugged Hitomi. "Your finally back! but..." All of a sudden, a look of sadness crossed his face. "Your here to see Van, aren't you?" Hitomi nodded excitedly. "Van.. he's... I'll bring you to see him." Allen said and carried Hitomi into the Guymelef with him.   
  
"He's in there." Allen had led Hitomi to the doors of a large room. Hitomi opened the door and atfirst, she saw only Van sitting at the edge of a bed. But when she pushed it open further, She gasped in pain. Van leaned forward and kissed a girl. She was beautiful, she had long white blond hair, azure blue eyes and she was wearing a silver robe. She looked as beautiful as an angel. "V... Van!" Hitomi uttered and took a step back. Van looked at Hitomi and gasped. The two looked at each other in shock and surprise. Van stood up and said, "Cerli, stay here. I have to talk to her." The beautiful girl nodded and smiled at Hitomi. Van walked up to Hitomi with confusion marring his beautiful features. He closed the big doors behind him and reached for Hitomi. Hitomi cried and took a step backwards. "Van, who's... who's.."  
Van shook his head. "Hitomi, why did you come back? after all this time I'd thought you'd forgoten me." Hitomi shook her head. "I could never forget you... But who's that girl?" Hitomi said. "that's Princess Cerli, my fiance." Van said his voice full of pain. "I met her a week after you left me.She helped me get over all my pain. Allen, he introduced me to her. Then..."   
Hitomi cried "Van... I... you... why does this always happen?" She slid down to the ground and began crying.  
Van sat down beside her and put an arm around her. Hitomi pushed his arm away. "Van, I went back to my world, and the boy I loved there went with my bestfriend. and now, I came back to find you, and you are engaged?" Her voice broke in sobs. "Hitomi.." Van said gently. "I..." Suddenly, his voice controted in pain. "This isn't my fault! Your the one who left me. I begged and begged you to stay with me. but you left me. and do you expect everything to be the same back here? You left me for 2 years Hitomi! 2 long years. for so long, I waited. Everynight I sat on the roof, I stared at the mystic moon waiting for that pillar of light. for 2 years no hope. Finally, I let myself love again. And then, you show up." His eyes were stoney. Hitomi was speechless. "So you stopped loving me. But did you even know that I wanted to see you, I never stopped loving you. I..." She stood up and walked away. "Forget it Van. just forget everything we ever shared." Van's heart ached as he looked at the retreating Hitomi. He turned and walked back into the room. The white haired girl looked at him with a frown on her lips. "that was Hitomi wasn't it?" She asked. "the girl that gave you so much pain. She's back isn't she."  
Van nodded. Princess Cerli stood up and walked to Van. "Van, your going to have to deal with the feelings." Van nodded and the two of them shared a kiss again.  
  
End of Chpt 3 


	4. Act of Confusion

  
Emerald Tears  
  
  
"Forget it Van. just forget everything we ever shared." Van's heart ached as he looked at the retreating Hitomi. He turned and walked back into the room. The white haired girl looked at him with a frown on her lips. "that was Hitomi wasn't it?" She asked. "the girl that gave you so much pain. She's back isn't she."  
Van nodded. Princess Cerli stood up and walked to Van. "Van, your going to have to deal with the feelings." Van nodded and the two of them shared a kiss again.  
  
Hitomi walked angrilly out of Allen's castle. A single tear rested on her cheek. She was so angry and confused that she didn't even know where she was going. Just then, a male voice called. "Hitomi! where are you going?" It was Allen. Allen jumped down from the roof and ran towards Hitomi's heart suddenly broke into a million pieces. She ran to Allen and lept into his arms crying.  
"Allen, I was so stupid. to think I would come back and he'd still be here. waiting for me." Allen smoothed her back and soothed. "Hitomi, i'm sorry you had to find out that way." Hitomi shook her head and wiped a tear away. "I had to find out one way or another." Allen looked at Hitomi with concern. "I care about you too much, I didn't want you to get hurt." Hitomi looked into Allen's eyes and felt something give inside of her. With a sudden feeling of impulsion, she pressed her lips against Allen's in a soul searing kiss. Allen's eyes widened in surprise but he returned her kiss. The two of them couldn't seem to break out of the embrace. Hitomi grabbed the back of Allen's head and kisses him harder. Allen broke away from Hitomi with confusion in his eyes. Hitomi breathed rapidly with a smile spread across her red face. "Allen... I... I..." Allen felt something inside of his heart jump. "Hitomi!" He picked Hitomi up into his arms and walked back to his room. He suddenly felt such love for Hitomi. "Hitomi... I..." He spluttered. Hitomi put one finger on his lips and shook her head. "You don't have to say anything. I already know how you feel. Now kiss me."  
She demanded and Allen lowered her onto his bed and he kissed her. Hitomi could feel his tongue explore her mouth. Hitomi untied Allen's robes and they fell to the ground with a thud. Allen unzipped Hitomi's uniform and flung them to a side of the room. He pushed Hitomi underneath the covers and Hitomi felt such pleasure when Allen ran his fingers down her body. She never felt such lust and love. She kissed Allen passionatly. She slid her body ontop of Allen's and she smoothed her fingers through his hair. She could feel his erection, as she allowed him to explore. "I bet you Van would never love me as good as Allen does!" She thought. Suddenly, her lower lip trembled. "I don't love Allen do I?" She thought as Allen wrapped his arms around Hitomi's bare back and kissed her neck. He nibbled her neck gently. "I... I'm doing this because Van doesn't want me anymore!" Hitomi's thoughts exploded and she suddenly pushed Allen away from her and stood up. She quickly pulled on her clothing and stepped away from Allen. The look on Allen's face was confusion and hurt. "Hitomi! what's wrong?" He stood up and walked to her, his hand reaching for her. "Allen, I... I can't do this." Hitomi stuttered and tried to open the door. Allen stepped infront of her and blocked her way from the door. "No girl on Gaea ever refuses me. Why is there any differance with you? Hitomi?" He asked. He reached out and caressed her cheek, he was so gentle, so concerned. Hitomi felt such a longing for love. But she didn't want Allen's love. She wanted Van's, but she could never have it.  
  
End of Chpt 4 


	5. Van finds out

  
Emerald Tears  
  
  
"Allen, I... I can't do this." Hitomi stuttered and tried to open the door. Allen stepped infront of her and blocked her way from the door. "No girl on Gaea ever refuses me. Why is there any differance with you? Hitomi?" He asked. He reached out and caressed her cheek. Hitomi felt such a longing for love. But she didn't want Allen's love. She wanted Van's, but she could never have it.  
  
"Allen... " She sighed and leaned back into his arms. Allen's eyes showed concern for her. He wrapped his arms around her and whispered. "Hitomi, I'll love you forever, but it's up to you." Hitomi settled back into Allen's warm, comforting arms. She closed her eyes and felt Allen guide her back to the bed. She didn't care anymore. All she wanted was love.   
  
Van had been walking down the hall. He shook his head as he felt the pain that Hitomi felt as she walked away. It was just like that day when she left. Only this time, it was Hitomi who walked away. A sob died in his throat. "Hitomi... why did you pick this time to come back? just when I was almost over you?" He walked down another corridor. He was almost out of Allen's castle when all of a sudden, he heard a small cry uttered from inside Allen's room. It was clearly Hitomi's. "Hitomi! She's in trouble!" Van slammed his body against Allen's door smashing it into the ground. He walked into Allen's room and gasped. Allen was sitting with his bare back to Van on his bed. He seemed to be passionatly kissing someone. That someone's head rested on Allen's shoulder. Van watched silently as Allen gently slid his fingers through Hitomi's brownish blond hair. Hitomi kissed him Allen gently pulled Hitomi's uniform down from her shoulders with his thumbs. Van's mouth opened in surprise.   
"Hi.. Hit... Hitomi!" He yelled. Allen's head whipped around and he looked right at Van. "Van!" Allen uttered in surprise. Van looked at Hitomi and Allen. They were obviously in love. It was his fault that he interupted. A sad and hurt look spread over his face as he saw Hitomi fumble to button up her shirt. Van turned on his heel and walked out of the room. "I'm sorry to bother you, Hitomi." he said sadly and slammed the door. A frustrated tear ran down Hitomi's face. She buttoned up the rest of her shirt and ran towards the door. "Hitomi! where are you going?" Allen said with a pained voice. Hitomi whipped around and starred at Allen. This was a man that she didn't love, she had given him what was most precious to her. Her love. She allowed him to explore her body, and now, she had lost Van too. "Allen... " Hitomi said her bottom lip trembling. "I can't do this. I don't... I don't love you!" Hitomi yelled and ran out of the room after Van.   
  
End of Chpt 5 


	6. Suicide

  
Emerald Tears  
  
  
Hitomi whipped around and starred at Allen. This was a man that she didn't love, she had given him what was most precious to her. Her love. She allowed him to explore her body, and now, she had lost Van too. "Allen... " Hitomi said her bottom lip trembling. "I can't do this. I don't... I don't love you!" Hitomi yelled and ran out of the room after Van.   
  
Van sprinted out into the fields of green grass. With a thud he sat down in the grass. He starred up into the blue heavens with a sigh. The sun was beginning to set. A film of tears clouded Van's vision. He didn't understand why he was so angry and so sad. Hitomi wasn't his, and he didn't belong to Hitomi either. He loved Princess Cerli and he let Hitomi know that. "NO!" Van yelled angrilly and thumped his fist down onto the ground. "I drove her to Allen, I helped make the decision for her. It's all my fault." He angrilly wiped away his tears. "I don't love Princess Cerli, I wanted love. I still love Hitomi, but now i've lost her. For good." He stood up and gazed up into the sky just as a light breeze ruffled his hair. "Mom, Dad, I know your up there. I'm sorry for what i've done. There's no more point in living. I'll make this sacrifice so I can be with you. To stop all this pain, that's shattering my heart. I... I can't deal with the feelings I have inside." Tears poured down his cheeks. He angrilly shook them off, and drew his sword. It shimmered in the moonlight as he waved it into the air. "I, Van Fanel King of Fanelia will now, suicide for the good of the people." He pointed it to his neck and whispered. "Good bye Hitomi. I'm sorry that i hurt you. I just wish, I just wish that I could see you before I die. I wish that just for one day, one moment, you loved me." He jabbed the tip of his sword into his neck. Dizziness clouded his vision. He could only see the soft moonlight shine onto the ground, he saw only the steady drip of his dark blood seeping into the soil. He prepared to stab the sword deeper when suddenly, a calming hand touched his, and pulled the sword away from his neck. Van fell to his knees in a faint. But not before he saw who his rescuer was. It was Princess Cerli. She never looked more beautiful. She looked like a goddess, her blue azure eyes looked down into his brown ones with pain embedded in her eyes. "Van... why did you do it?" Van fell to the ground in pain. "because.. because I love Hitomi." Then, Van seeped into a dead faint.  
  
End of Chpt 6 (sorry it's so short, but I wanted to stop it here.^_^) 


	7. Showdown

  
Emerald Tears  
  
It was Princess Cerli. She never looked more beautiful. She looked like a goddess, her blue azure eyes looked down into his brown ones with pain embedded in her eyes. "Van... why did you do it?" Van fell to the ground in pain. "because.. because I love Hitomi." Then, Van seeped into a dead faint.  
  
When Van opened his eyes, Princess Cerli was standing at his bedside, worried."Prin.. Princess.." He muttered and tried to sit up. That's when Princess Cerli leaned down lovingly and kissed Van. "My Prince, you're finally awake." Van nodded. "Princess, I have to talk to you, I..." Princess Cerli looked at him out of the corner of her eye. She could sense that something was burdening Van's heart. "Before you fainted Van, do you know what you said?" Princess Cerli said quietly. Van looked at her with a confused look. "what did I say?" Suddenly, Princess Cerli stood up and whirled around, her silver robe shimmering. "You don't even remember. Van, do you remember the first time you told me you loved me? Do you even remember?" Her voice was full of hurt and pain. Van sat up. "I... remember. I told you I loved you after our first kiss. When... when you helped me forget my past and pain." Van said with rememberance. Princess Cerli turned around and a single tear rested on her cheek. "But you don't really feel the same way anymore do you?" She said.  
Van looked Princess Cerli right in the eye and said "I don't know what your talking about." Princess Cerli tugged at her white blond hair in frustration and hurt. "Yes you do. You don't love me because the last thing you said was you wanted to suicide because you loved Hitomi.. And you.." Just then, the door flung open and Hitomi ran in all out of breath. "Van!" She said but stopped short when she saw Princess Cerli. "umm..." She backed one step back. Princess Cerli's angrilly strode towards Hitomi. "You little bitch. How dare you come in here? After all you've done. You don't even know what you did. For that   
whole year, Van was full of pain when you left him. It took a whole year for him to realized that he loved me. Then, you come back and make him relive his past. He even tried to suicide because you slept with Allen." Sensing Hitomi's surprise, She continued. "Yeah, everyone knows. You're known as the castle slut now. You can never make up your mind. You hurt Van and he almost lost his life. You came back to Gaea expecting he'd be waiting here for you? I love Van with all my heart. But he loves you still. And there's nothing I can do to stop him. Van made me so happy. But your just here to ruin it. Hitomi, you broke too many hearts. Me and Van, so perfect for each other. He was my King, and I his princess, I love him." Princess Cerli said with pain. She turned to Van and said gently. "Van, i'm saying good bye now. I know you won't miss me, but don't try to stop me." The Princess reached into her back pocket and pulled slowely out a thin blade knife. Van couldn't see, but Hitomi could. Hitomi lept forward and said "Princess Cerli! Don't..." Princess Cerli turned angrilly towards Hitomi with tears running down her face. "You, don't care whether I live or die. You want me to die so you can have Van all to yourself. I guess your wish came true." Princess Cerli raised the knife and stabbed herself in the heart. Van lept up from his covers and embraced Princess Cerli. "Princess! Why?" He said with pain etched in his voice. Princess Cerli caressed Van's cheek lightly with the last ounce of strength she had in her body. "Van, I.. I.." She tried to say as her body went limp. "Van... I did it because.." She whispered quietly. Tears poured down Van's face. He leaned closer to her lips so he could hear her better. "I did it because I love you Van." She whispered as the words died on her lips. She was dead.   
  
End of Chpt 7 


	8. Aww... mushy stuff all da way! well, hal...

  
Emerald Tears  
  
  
"Princess! Why?" He said with pain etched in his voice. Princess Cerli caressed Van's cheek lightly with the last ounce of strength she had in her body. "Van, I.. I.." She tried to say as her body went limp. "Van... I did it because.." She whispered quietly. Tears poured down Van's face. He leaned closer to her lips so he could hear her better. "I did it because I love you Van." She whispered as the words died on her lips. She was dead.   
  
Van nodded as he kissed the Princess once more on the cheek. He laid her down on the bed and crossed her arms on her chest, he picked up the rose. the first rose he had given to her. It was perfectly dried and kept. He slipped it between her fingers and whispered "Good bye Princess." He sifted his fingers through her long white blond hair, and he caressed her cheek gently. Hitomi walked forward as a tear slipped down her cheek. Van turned and saw Hitomi, still standing there. A surge of feelings rippled through his body. "Hitomi... " Hitomi rushed forward and buried herself in his arms. "You still love me?" Hitomi said overcome with emotion. Van nodded and leaned forward to kiss Hitomi. Suddenly, without warning, a flash of rememberance of Hitomi kissing Allen flipped through Van's head. He pushed Hitomi aside and ran out of the room. Hitomi ran after him. She found him in the fields kneeling down and gazing into the indigo blue sky. "Van... I.." Van turned around and looked at Hitomi with sadness. "You don't love me. You slept with Allen, you... you love him." Hitomi shook her head. "After you left I knew I didn't love him. I just wanted love." She took his hand. "Your love." Tears raced down Van's cheeks and splashed onto the ground. "It took me this long to realize it." Hitomi said her tears welling up inside of her. Van stood up thinking. "But you didn't have to sleep with him. That changes everything. It may of happened fast. but it changes things between us." Van said turning his back to her. Hitomi jumped up and touched Van's shoulder, and withdrew it when he flinched. "Van!" She said quickly. "It was the worst mistake I ever could of done. I... I wanted love so badly, and Allen was conforting me. I didn't... mean.." Van whipped around and starred with firey eyes at Hitomi. "How can you even say that?" He spat with anger in his voice. "You can't sleep with someone, a most intimate experiance and just say you didn't mean it and expect me to forgive. I...I love you but I can't." Hitomi took one step back and shook her head. "I know I can't make everything better, and you don't know how much it hurt me, after I realized that I had given Allen my virginity, but I didn't love him. You just don't know." She said emotionally and pushed a lock of her hair back slowly. Van looked at her with longing but quickly said "Hitomi, I..." Hitomi placed a finger apon his lips. "Van, all I can say is that i'm sorry, and if you think that i'm a slut and i'm not good enough for you then i'm sorry. You don't know how much I want to kill myself right now, but I can't because I love you too much to die. I..." Hitomi shook her hand in midair, but stopped with Van caught her wrist. "Hitomi, you're the first one to say you love but didn't want to die. I don't want to be unfair to Princess Cerli's memory, but Hitomi, I knew I loved you from the first time I met you. I never stopped loving you." He said that and a sweet smile spread across his face. Hitomi's eyes lit up in relief and Van swept her into his arms. Their lips met and the kiss seemed to go on forever. Van broke away from the kiss and whispered "I love you Hitomi." Hitomi slipped her hands around his back and opened her eyes. Van had never felt more contented as he gazed into those Emerald eyes he loved so much.  
  
THE END!  
  
*^_____^*  
  
  
Well *sniff* i hope you all liked it! It was 8 chpts long, but i enjoyed writing it so please review! I wanna hear your feedback. H/V fics are sooo sweet to write. Please be gentle though, it's my first real fic. thnx!   
-cHiBi_HiTaRu 


End file.
